As I write this I am on a coach to Norwich, others around me are sleeping, watching TV or listening to the football and here I am writing a blog about not resting and it seems I am being productive yet again!
I wear my productivity as a badge and I really don't think it's healthy....
Why do I find it so hard to rest?
Why do I every day have a ‘to do’ list that most of the time I can't get through in a day?
Even on my coach journey I had a 'to do' list of 5 items and today is suppose to be a day off.
I recently had a few sessions with a friend who has just trained to be a life coach.
After our first session I went away with new ideas and projects. When I had the second session she said to me ‘ how did you do all that in a week’ my ego was happy with this (!) but then she then followed up and said how did `I celebrate and rest'? Ticking off projects on my list was much easier to report back than the realisation that I am terrible at just being and relaxing… I have to be producing all the time it seems.
I am a human producer not a human being.
I am writing about this as I know that I am not the only one who has this problem!
By being so task focused I am not being mindful at all.
I need to slow down….
So I have been working on this area.. allowing myself to sit in the sun and enjoy listening to the birds and watch the clouds go by. I am allowed to lie in, I am allowed to drink tea and read in bed on a Sunday morning (and ignore my late fathers voice in my head telling me I am lazy!!) . I am allowed to float around in the swimming pool at my lovely spa gym and just enjoy being in the water and not feel I have to swim 100 lengths.
I have been trying to do this in my yoga practice too, not trying to get anywhere.. accepting that there are many poses I probably will never be able to do and that’s ok.
In fact it's more than ok. Going back to basics enjoying being in child's pose or downface dog, just being mindful and being in my body is plenty. I don’t need more from my practice.
Maybe it’s age that has helped me change how I practice. I often take beginner style classes online ( I don’t feel any need/pressure) to do more advanced poses.
Now I have been able to do that in my yoga practice my next step is to translate that into the rest of my life!!